I had an experience this week which really bothers me. One of our members went home to the Lord. This was not unexpected given her advanced age and health issues, but it was still painful for those of us who loved that person.
I was contacted by one of the person’s children and asked to refrain from speaking about sin or the fact that their parent had been a sinner during the service. They wanted to keep everything “upbeat” and happy. I said that the Gospel is only good news if you know what the alternative is–eternity in hell. Sinners who know Christ as Lord and Savior are not bound for punishment but for an eternity in the presence of the Lord. That’s what makes the news good for believers. That, however, wasn’t good enough. There could be no discussion of such things because they were a “downer”, I guess. I also pointed out that funerals always have people in attendance who have not heard the Gospel and it is an important part of a funeral service to witness to those folks, especially when the deceased had a saving faith.
Well, none of this was good enough and so we’re not having a funeral. The family is sponsoring its own celebration of life at a civic building. That’s okay, I know where the deceased is and I rejoice in their salvation.
Despite being disturbed by this one incident, I have to say that I have been put off for some time about these so-called celebrations of life that have become popular. I’m especially put off when they take place in churches. Oh, I know that the family and friends want to hear good things about the one they mourn, and I have no objection to that at all. There is a place in our service for a Life Sketch where that is done. But there is also the proclamation of the Gospel in readings, prayers, hymns and a sermon. What is taking place here is not about the person’s life in this world, however long that may be. It is about the person’s life on the other side of the door–the really long part of life, not the short one.
St. Paul writes that we are not to grieve as do those who have no hope. Grieving is normal, but it becomes abnormal when it is either stuffed down in our gut, kept and massaged in our minds, or when people try to assuage their grief with a big party. Only faith in Jesus and in the eternal blessings bestowed on His elect people can truly give us hope filled grief, a bearable grief which has with it a true sense of victory over sin, death and the devil.
As a pastor I have responsibility for the care of the souls whom I serve. I won’t allow that to be diluted by worldly views. If that makes me a bad guy, I guess I’m a bad guy. But I will always care much more about the long future of my parishioners than about their short past.